Thursday, May 22, 2008

Why do pre-tied bow ties exist?

They never look right. They gape, rather, at the front. And they are not better than a real bow tie in case of a strangling maniac, so you can't even argue safety.

A bow tie is not actually that difficult to tie, either. All you have to do is learn. Which will take you five minutes. Five minutes will allow to seem like a grown-up and not a seven-year-old for the rest of your life.

I will also take this opportunity to inveigh against gentlemen who seem to think it's all right to wear a four-in-hand to dinner or in the evening. It's not. Since people stopped wearing dinner dress as a regular thing, it has ceased to evolve. Therefore fancy touches and experimentation are not allowed. Also, if you're wearing a four-in-hand with a rather high-buttoning waistcoat (which is what happens), it makes it appear as though you have been wearing the same thing since you got married in the morning. Fool!

A gentleman is lucky in that he may wear the same thing to dinner forever. I don't understand why he can't figure out how to do so correctly.

2 comments:

Dave said...

I'll take this rant as indication that you have not yet seen the new Indiana Jones film.

Bagdis said...

DO NOT SEE IT.