Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Why is it now impossible to care about anything at all without being an unwashed jackass sleeping in a park?

That's right: if you're not currently in a tent somewhere, you don't care.  Nope, you don't.  It is literally the only acceptable way to be politically active, or even human.  Voting is passé.  Writing to your congressman is laughable.  Working in a soup kitchen?  For fools.

If you're not occupying something, you are almost certainly, right now, eviscerating a kitten.  Not even to eat it!  Just for fun!  You ate a baby already.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh, occupying anything, in my mind, is so passe. The new way to show how much you care is by growing a beard--a very long, bushy beard that you can braid and hide whole villages of tiny people in. And you don't even have to be male. Beards are now an equal-opportunity fashion statement.

Anonymous said...

I love you.